10.
The Art of Vulnerability
It was the summer of 2009 when I met Gavin Brown. He was single, had graduated from the same Bible university as me, and now worked where I worked. When he first came to Trinity, he moved in temporarily with the worship pastor at the church where I was the Administrative (Executive) Pastor. For the first year we worked together, we just attended the same meetings, but we had not spent much personal time together. We had not developed a common ground or trust yet.
Gavin loved to have fun. Few people did not know who Gavin was, and if you met him, you would understand why. He is as outgoing as they come. He likes to include everyone, and when he is around, there will be laughter, honest conversation, and inquisitiveness that opens the door to understanding.
I wanted to get to know him better, so I asked him to lunch (or coffee, the details escape me). However, I do remember Gavin mentioned he wished he had taken the time to get to know me when he first arrived. We had mutual friends from Valley Forge University, some that he had come to know in different circles. Over the next four years, we shared many times of laughter, conversations, and acceleration of friendship that became a reprieve from the craziness of ministry and relationships where we worked and ministered.
One of our favorite places to go for lunch is a restaurant in Lutherville, MD, called Bertucci’s. For less than ten dollars we could get a fantastic lunch, endless salad, and fire-baked rolls that are to die for! Don’t forget the olive oil and spices to dip your rolls in. At first, we spent an hour or so getting to know each other, but with each visit, the conversation would open up to more profound thoughts, vulnerable discussions about our past, the current struggles we were facing, how work and ministry were going (we solved all the problems the church was having), and relationships.
At some point, Bertucci’s became a difficult place to meet for these more